vegkatmakesstuff:

I don’t know about that, but I have seen on Pinterest that you can cut open a glow stick and shake that stiff into a jar with some glitter. It will only glow for a few hours and it’s not quite a “snow globe” because there isn’t much liquid in those, but it’s glowy and glittery.

Didn’t mean to answer this with that blog. Dumb Tumblr app.

I don’t know about that, but I have seen on Pinterest that you can cut open a glow stick and shake that stiff into a jar with some glitter. It will only glow for a few hours and it’s not quite a “snow globe” because there isn’t much liquid in those, but it’s glowy and glittery.

HOW TO MAKE VEGGIE STOCK.

Now, there are some ok brands of stock out there for you to buy, but it’s like the easiest thing in the world to make, and you literally use garbage and water, so it’s cheap. Why wouldn’t you make your own? Plus yours will taste SO much better.

Keep one of those big sized freezer bags in your freezer (I dunno, quart, gallon, five gallon? You know, the big one), and every time you chop up some veggies, put the scraps in that bag. Peeling an onion for your sammich? Put the skins in that bag. Chopping up a green pepper because they are awesome on everything when they are sautéed? Put the stem end and the ribs an seeds and shit in that bag. Got some carrots that aren’t rotten yet but aren’t exactly crisp and delicious anymore? Put em in the bag! Leftover mixed veggies you would rather pass up in favor of Fritos? BAG THAT SHIT. (There are veggies you won’t want to use.  That thing in my pot is a zucchini, even though it looks like a cucumber.  I don’t think a cuke would work. I can’t think of any others, so just use your better judgement.)

When the bag is full, dump it in to a big pan of water (I don’t know how much water, just fill it up - MEASURING IS FOR LOSERS), bring it to a simmer and let it cook for at least a few hours, or all day if you want. You don’t have to worry about over cooking them, because duh that’s the point. Add a pinch of salt if that’s your thing, and throw in some herbs if you want. Fresh ones would be great, and trimmings can always go in your freezer bag. Otherwise I just dump some marjoram, basil, oregano, etc. in there. Whatever you can pull out of your spice cabinet will probably be fine. Just don’t over do it, because you can always add that stuff to whatever dish you make later on with your stock. 

After it has simmered all day, turn off your burner and let it cool a bit. You don’t want to hurt yourself. After about an hour, put a colander over a big bowl or another big pan, and CAREFULLY pour everything through. If you have a compost bin, put your expended veggies in there. Your worms will fucking LOVE THEM. If not, just put them in the garbage so they can be taken to the landfill and you can contribute to killing the earth. Whatever.

At this point your stock will still have some seeds and herbs and junk in it, so get out that metal mesh strainer thingy and pour it through that once, maybe twice. 

What you have now is LIQUID GOLD. If you are using it now, go to town.  Or you can pour it in a freezer bag once it’s cooled and save it for later.  Sometimes I put some in ice cube trays so I can add a little at a time to rice or whatever I’m making that doesn’t need like a whole gallon of stock.  

Seriously. Garbage and water. Easy peasy. Make some.  

Recently, a guy I went to high school with (and junior high… and grade school… we may have even been in the same kindergarden class…) contacted me and said he had an idea for something to be stitched on a throw pillow, and immediately thought of me. See, I force my embroidered “art” on all my Facebook friends and then rub their faces in in it and say, “Look at it! LOOOOOK at it!” I guess it pays off once in a while. His idea was to have “Go balls deep” put on a pillow. Some chicks may have been put off by being thought of with this phrase, but not this gal. The only issue was he was specifically non-specific. He just gave me the phrase and some colors, and told me to go nuts. So to speak.

I sometimes have anxiety issues when it comes to making things for other people. If I just make them to amuse myself, and someone else likes it, awesome. But when it comes to making it FOR someone, I get all crazy and all I can picture is rejection. Even when it’s just a crocheted baby hat that I could make in my sleep. And with such little guidance on this project, I was a little frightened. But, I do love being challanged and pushed to create something I wouldn’t usually come up with on my own.

I always like to pretend I have some air of mystery about myself, but I really don’t. I’m a giddy spaz that can’t keep anything to myself. I even modeled my wedding dress for my hubby the day I bought it, after having told him he wouldn’t even see it until our actual wedding. So much for tradition and silly superstitions, right? Anyway, in the spirit of my inability to keep anything remotely mysterious, and since this was my first time doing a pillow, I thought I’d document my progress and make a little photo tutorial in case anyone else would care to make one. And the best part: No sewing machine! So here’s how we take a pillow from zero (whaaa, all lonely and a tag sticking out like a total loser):

First, you take your boring pillow and look for the outside seam. Every pillow has one, because you can’t sew it shut from the inside, dummy. It’s usually the end with a tag sticking out, but if yours is missing the tag, just look for it. You’ll know what you are looking for when you see it. Once you find said seam, rip that bitch apart. But carefully, please! You have to re-assemble later!

Hopefully your pillow stuffings will be encased in a second “case”, but if not, just shove the stuffing into a bag and save for later.

Oh, yeah. You’ll need something to put ON the pillow, so draw something up, use a pattern or find an image online. Just try to make sure it’s public domain, ok? Don’t steal stuff, cause that’s just not awesome. I usually draw my own embroideries, but I couldn’t quite do what I was trying to do, so I needed some help. Don’t judge me. Then you just tape some tracing paper to your screen and trace the image. Then write something witty. :-)

I hope you like tracing, because you are going to have to do it again. Flip your tracing paper over and trace the back of the whole thing with a washable, iron-on fabric pencil. And push HARD on that pencil. I didn’t, and had to trace it AGAIN, and some of my lines still were kind of faint on the pillow case.

Find the center of your pillow and the center of your drawing, line them up then tape your image to the pillow.

Make sure it’s secure and won’t move at all, because you don’t want your lines to be blurry or doubled. Oh, and make sure you don’t iron over the tape. It melts. Luckily for me, it didn’t melt into the fabric, but it could, so watch out. And, use some common sense and make sure you’ve got the front of the pillow (the side with the piping or ruffles or whatever), and that your open seam is on the bottom.

Once you have your image on your case, center it in an embroidery hoop and make sure it’s DRUMHEAD TIGHT!

Oh, and let’s put the inner ring INSIDE the case, ok kids? Otherwise you’ll be embroidering through the front and the back, and good luck getting the stuffing back in that way. I thought it would be a giant pain in the ass putting my hand inside the pillow for every stitch, but it really wasn’t that bad. You totally get used to it. I think the pillow kind of liked it, too.

Now that you’ve done all the prep work, get stitching! Mine was a big image, and there are lots and lots (and lots) of stitches, but just take them one at a time. You probably wouldn’t be doing this if you didn’t love to stitch.

I chose to do this entirely in back stitch, because I think it’s the best stitch to get around all those curvy lines. I’m not offering any tips on the actual embroidery, because I taught myself and would probably teach you wrong. But there are tons of great embroidery tutorials and how-to guides online, so it would be in your best interest to check those out instead of have me try to go into it and confuse you.

In the vision I had of the finished product, it involved some satin stitching. I have done it a few times, but am by no means an expert at it. Well, I tried it on here, but since I’m a total perfectionist, I just couldn’t handle that it turned out a little wonky, so I decided to take that stitching out and have the letters be open. I would have liked to fill them in, but I just don’t think the fabric could have supported that many stitches in one area.

I was actually kind of sad when the stitching was done, because this was a super fun project. Ok, maybe not ‘running around downtown Chicago’ fun or ‘hula-hooping for 40 minutes straight’ fun, but a relaxing, nerdy kind of fun. But then again, I was super excited when the stitching was done because I could finally see the finished product, and it was GLORIOUS.

Now you have to wash it to get the pencil marks out. I know! Shhh, it’s ok baby. It will be alright.  I was scared, too, because you never know what can happen in water. DMC floss is usually colorfast, so I recommend using that. Don’t try to pinch pennies and use that stuff that comes in the friendship bracelet kit. Shell out the 38 cents per skein; it’s worth it. Just fill a sink, put in a couple drops of detergent and give it a few swishes. That’s it. Then hang it to dry.

Now you have to get out the ironing board, AGAIN. Yeah, yeah, I know. I won’t even iron my husband’s work shirts, but it’s a necessity for this project. Turn it inside out, because you don’t want to iron on the top of embroidery. You’ll smash your stitches and it won’t look cool. Slip a towel into the pillow case to absorb some heat and cushion your stitches.

Iron both sides, then make sure you press the open raw edge that you will be sewing shut. That way you don’t really have too much need for pins. I hate pins.

Cram the stuffing back in then stitch that bitch up! I sewed mine by hand. It really wasn’t bad at all, but you could use a sewing machine if you want. I find hand sewing is more precise, plus I hate my sewing machine’s guts. In case you, the loyal reader, haven’t noticed, I really tend to only to projects that can be done soley by hand. When you get a machine involved it’s like bringing in another person, and my sewing machine is a bitch that speaks in tongues. I just don’t get her.

Done and done.

See? It wasn’t that bad. Sure, there are a lot of steps, but none are especially difficult, and it turned out SO RAD. *Sniff sniff, weep weep* I’m gonna miss him. Someone’s apartment is now going to have 100% more awesome.

When I moved into my house, the previous owners left a few things hanging on the walls, and in the room my son now occupies there was this ugly shelf nailed to the wall.

We kept it up for a while and tried to load it up with stuff to hide it, but it’s massive ugliness kept peeking through and pissing me off. So I took it down, and the hubby was going to take it to the curb, but I said, “No, wait. Let’s put it in the basement, because we might find a use for it someday.” He rolled his eyes and was probably picturing our house looking like a “Hoarders” house in the very near future. But I knew… I just knew that little guy would have a second chance at life.

A couple years after banishing it to the dark recesses of our basement, I came across this post over at the much loved Just Something I Made blog, and her before pic of the amazing table Cathe transformed made me think of my ugly shelf. Outdated, weird (in a bad way) wood finish, silly curves. But then she spray painted it black, and kind of roughed it up a bit, and it looked amazing! (Can you guess what happens to my ugly shelf? Well, keep reading folks!) It only took me like TWO MONTHS to for her project and my ugly shelf to swim across my brain and meet up. Then I was all, “Um, duh.”

So I took ugly shelf outside and spray painted the dickens out of it. I probably should have primed it, sanded it, washed it… something… but I was too impatient (as always) and just wanted it black. It took many, many coats, and I had to make sure I got all those little nooks and crannies. It took all day since I had to wait between coats, otherwise you end up with a not-so-awesome finish. But it was worth it!

I couldn’t decide if I should just leave it as-is, or distress it a bit. It looked a million times better, but a bit plain, so distressing won. But now I had to find some sand paper. Hmmm… I haven’t seen sandpaper ‘round these parts in a ‘coon’s age. [This is not a racist saying; it actually means ‘racoon’.] So I sat and pouted, and picked at my hangnails for a while. Man, I could really use a manicure. Manicure. Nails. NAIL FILE! For a project like this, where all I wanted was to sand the very edges, an old emery board would be perfect! So I dug one out that was pretty worn out, and it worked like a charm!

Here’s a close up without the file in the way.

I just went around the edges and sanded, but didn’t make it perfect. Some spots got a bit more attention, some didn’t get any. It’s supposed to look like perhaps it was all black at one time, but over the years some has worn away. I was quite excited with how it turned out. And so was the hubby. He was skeptical at first, since I didn’t tell him any of my plans for it. Especially when I sat down with my emery board. But when I finished, his face brightened up. I don’t know if it was because it looked so nice, or if it was because he realized I now had a place to put some of my chotchkies we are constantly prying from the VegKids’ fat little baby fingers. Probably some of both.

(You can tell by the date on the pic I’ve been meaning to get around to posting about this shelf for a while… Ugh.)

1. Adam West as Batman with Bat Girl.
2. My oldest Nancy Drew book that VegBoy is obsessed with destroying. I have a bunch from the ’60s, but this is from 1940, and this is the one he goes for.
3. My super duper awesoome tea pot.
4. A set of ping pong balls signed by Broken Lizard. Who? These delicious hunks of man meat:

You know… Super Troopers? The balls were a promo for the movie Beerfest, and the tube they are in are signed by the guys. With real ink! Sigh… The hubs thinks my infatuation with a bunch of guys with a penchant for dick jokes and frat boy humor is bordering on a dangerous obsession, but he tries not to judge.

Anyway, back to the shelf. I just wanted to share my little make-over with you, and maybe inspire you to look around your house and find something to change. Instead of sending that night stand to the curb and dropping a wad of cash on a new one, try spraying it with a new color. If you don’t like it, you’ll only be out a couple bucks. Or you can call it “art” and make fun of people who don’t get your “vision.”

vegkat:

So, you’re throwing a dinner party and want a dessert that won’t require an oven because the temperature outside is roughly the same as the surface of the sun, but will also delight your guests and make them clap and squeal with glee? Something that will satisfy the 50s housewife in you but will also be easy enough for the 21st century woman (OR MAN!) that was brought up on Kraft macaroni & cheese and Little Debbie snack cakes?

ICE CREAM BOOOMMMMMBE!

Here’s how to do it:

1) You put on your vintage 1950s apron and put on some great 50s music.  My favorite for getting in the mood is Esqivel (thanks Shane!), but Harry Belefonte works great, too. Seriously, this is probably the most important step. And while the cat eye glasses and pearl necklace aren’t required, they sure do make it more realistic and authentic. And fun. So does the martini.

2) Go to the store and pick out 3 or more flavors of ice cream and/or sherbet.  I’m not going to tell you what kind, because you know what you like.  Experiment.  I just hope you’re smart enough to realize that Reese’s peanut butter ice cream probably won’t be super awesome paired with orange mango sherbet.  But whatever. It’s going in your face hole, not mine.  The outside flavor is the one you need the most of, so you might want more than one container.  I chose three flavors: A) Cherry Vanilla, B) Chocolate and C) Banana Split. OK, so my 6 year old picked them out, but I think she did a damn good job.

Then pick your favorite big ass bowl, one that can handle freezing and thawing without the possibility of breaking.  I used my vintage yellow Pyrex mixing bowl because it’s awesome.  Oh, and because those types of bowls don’t have a flat interior bottom so they make a nice half-ball shaped mold for your bombe. But you can use a Jell-O mold, a bundt cake pan, some aluminum foil shaped into a makeshift bowl… whatever.

3) Take flavor A and put it in the fridge for 30 minutes or so and put your bowl in the freezer.  Oh, and put your other flavors in the freezer, ya dingus. Don’t leave them on the counter. After your ice cream has had time to UNIFORMLY thaw (that’s why you thaw in the fridge instead of the countertop), you take your frozen bowl and smear the ice cream around the bowl leaving a cozy little ice cream nest in the middle.  You can put Saran Wrap or wax paper down and set a smaller bowl in there to shape it, but I just used my damn hands. 

4) Put the bowl in the freezer and get your second flavor into the fridge. Wait until B is soft and A is hard. Then just repeat the last step with flavor B.

5) Stick that bitch back in the freezer and, you got it, put flavor C in the fridge. I decided to use C as a “crust” that covered the whole bottom instead of nesting it in the other two flavors. But you do what you want. It’s your fucking bombe. Then just spread the last flavor on.

6) Smooth the whole thing out with wax paper. (I had trouble with the ice cream sticking to my spoons no matter what material it was made of, so I did most of this with my hands and paper and Saran Wrap.)

7) Now stick it in the freezer for several hours or overnight.

8) When your bombe is good and hard and ready (EH?), take it out of the freezer and put the whole bowl in a bigger bowl partially filled with hot water for a few seconds to loosen it from the mold. Then take it out of the water, dry the outside of the bowl and put a plate or serving tray or whatever you plan on serving it from over it and invert the whole deal. Lift up the mold, then stick it (the ice cream, not the empty bowl, dummy) back in the freezer so it doesn’t melt all over the damn place.

(Oh, and once it’s out you can decorate with berries, sprinkles, that weird chocolate Magic Shell shit, whipped cream, coffee grounds… I just left it plain because… well… I forgot to buy decoraty stuff. Whatever. It was still beautiful.)

AND… 

I used my gramma’s crystal pedestal cake plate because it’s gorgeous. But any old plate will work.

Then you cut into it aaaaaand… TA DA!

Yes we used Hello Kitty and Thomas the Train plates because we ran out of nice ones.  SO WHAT. 

Here’s a pic of my (second) slice.

Then, if you have leftovers, you just put the cake plate cover over your bombe and save it for another day.

This is where using a fancy serving plate is nice because it will look lovely on your counter top until you can enjoy your treat later.

Best part? Even if you really fuck it up and your layers don’t look nice, it’s still fucking ice cream and your guests will love it because it’s FUCKING ICE CREAM and it’s 103 degrees outside.